Choosing to be Positive!
Have you ever wondered what constitutes a “negative person”? I heard that all my life, but never really understood. Then the other day, I finally got it!
I was sitting in a room with a friend, his family, and their newborn. The grandmother was holding the baby – less than 24 hours old – who was lifting its head. She commented that “Babies this age should not be able to lift their heads”. I thought that odd. She could have said, “This baby is very strong at such an early age. She is already lifting her head”. As I continued observing this woman, much of what she said was negative; however, her intent was positive.
Recently, I have become more conscious of the negative words that we all use. I am working toward eliminating them from my language; words such as “if, no, try, and not”. When I catch myself using a negative or less than positive word, I stop, sometimes in mid sentence, back up to the beginning of the thought, and restructure my sentence. For example, I just spoke with a client and started to say, “If you are successful with your networking, you will earn $100,000 in the next 12 months”. I changed “if” to “when”. It now becomes a much stronger, positive message.
Today when I choose to avoid dessert, I say, “I might have some later”. Later could be in the next few minutes or next year. I currently choose to eat dessert once per week, on Saturday, date night. When asked to participate in an activity when I would rather do something else, I say, “Thank you. I already have time set aside for something else”. I have nearly eliminated “no” from my vocabulary.
What is the value of removing negative words from your vocabulary? First, you will only be positive. When you choose to be contrary, it will still be positive.
Instead of saying “I can’t do that,” you will say, “I choose to do something else”. Rather than say, “I will try to be on time,” you could say, “I will be on time”.
When removing the negative from your language, you begin surrounding yourself with more positive people. Your intention with clients, potential clients and your team support will be more proactive. Besides being positive, you will be more effective. Your attitude will shine. You will sparkle. Your energy will rise through the roof. Relationships will blossom and mature. Health interactions will occur more frequently.
Identify those negative speakers in your life. Make a decision to support change, choose to change your interaction, or ignore the negative. For those you wish to be in front of, you might send them excerpts from this article. Encourage those that are positive speakers by telling them they are, and how much more effective it makes them.
Share this concept with family and friends. Send this to those who are both positive and negative speakers. Open a thoughtful debate. Solicit a response. Ask them to self evaluate where they are. Are they positive communicators or negative communicators? We choose to be either positive or negative. Which are you?
Gerry Rose runs INTEGRITY Networking Solutions in Oceanside, CA. He works with realtors who want to attract the right prospects and their affinity partners who want to generate more referrals. More than 10,000 businesses have been presented the INTEGRITY Networking Solutions system in San Diego, Riverside, and Orange Counties.
Gerry’s stimulating presentation Unlimited Prospects, Unlimited Referrals is ideally suited for small business owners, home-based businesses, and independent professionals who want clearer direction and want to attract more prospects, develop dynamic systems, and strengthen their companies’ accountability. Gerry does one on one consulting, conducts a range of keynote speeches from thirty minutes to full-day education workshops.
His books, Unlimited Prospects, Unlimited Referrals, 101 Tips to Attract Prospects, 101 Tips to Generate Referrals and Unlimited Prospects, Unlimited Referrals, Giving Your Clients What They WANT, So You Get What You WANT are currently available. Unlimited Prospects, Unlimited Referrals, Using Your Time, Energy, and Creativity to Create Value, will be available in 2006.
Gerry has more than 20 years’ experience directing business owners how to grow their businesses. He is a networking dynamo. Those who know him will assure you that he does a great job of bringing people together—which is why he started Integrity.
Involved with networking organizations since 1984, Gerry is an Accomplished Toastmaster, a member of Toastmaster International, and has chaired numerous chambers of commerce and non-profit organizations.
Are you truly committed to attracting the right prospects and generate more referrals? If so then contact INTEGRITY Networking Solutions for availability and information. You can contact Gerry by mail at 1610 Quiet Hills Drive, Oceanside, CA 92056. Direct dial (760) 439-4623; e-mail to gerry@integritysd.com. For more information, go to www.integritysd.com
